This is to my best friend who I love more than anything in the world.
I know that life gets you down a lot and things don’t really seem to go your way. I know that you feel hopeless and lost a whole lot and there doesn’t seem to be any way out of it. I try my best to help you but unfortunately, I don’t have all the answers. I act like I do though sometimes because I’m just trying to make you feel better. Trying to make you smile. When you smile, I know it’s real. I know you are happy when you smile. Even if it’s just for a second. Whatever I have to do to get you to that moment is more than worth it.
I don’t think you realize how much I owe you. When I met you, I was the most insecure little kid on the planet. I wasn’t comfortable with who I was. In fact, I barely knew who I was. But then you came along and you were confident and you didn’t care how the world looked at you. I was so jealous of you. I wanted that confidence and nonchalance.
We became best friends. We are best friends. I’ve never had a friend like you. We’re complete opposites. It’s why it works.
I hate to see you down. I hate to see you feeling lonely. I hate it when you aren’t happy with yourself. I hate it when you aren’t happy with your life. I hate it when you feel unloved. More than all of that, I hate it when you become ashamed of who you are. I absolutely despise it. I spent the first two years of knowing you being jealous of who you are. Sometimes, even now, I’m still jealous.
I’m also really grateful though too. You taught me to be proud of who I am. You helped me find out who I am. You were a friend to me when no one else was. You were my first real friend. A friend who actually gave a shit about what was going on in my life.
There are simple things you’ve done that you’ve probably forgotten that meant the world to me. When my family was fighting non-stop, you kept inviting me to your house, probably unaware of what I was being saved from. When my dad lost his job, you were on the phone with me for an hour just listening. When my brother had suffered from heart failure, you held me as I sobbed in your arms. There are so many other things that you’ve done for me as well.
Point being, I couldn’t ask for a better friend than you. You are worth so much more than what you are dealing with right now. You were a friend to me, now it’s my turn to be a friend to you.